andy san dimas, awkward, bisexual, CCG, creepy, creepy guy, cunnilingus, dating, douche, drugs, going down, gross guy, horrible husband, horrible sex, Kelly, married, missing an ex, morning after, overshare, polyamory, porn, propositioning, sex, sex blog, sex on couch, Taylor, terrible cunnilingus, terrible sex, threesome, weed
At last, the final installment.
The Almost Threesome from Hell, Part 3.
This post follows on from Part 5 of the “I’ll have a large order…” series. The story continues directly.
THE (ALMOST) SEX
We got back, bag of weed in Kelly’s handbag. I went to sit on the couch. CCG came to sit behind me and started to rub my breasts through my dress. I didn’t protest but I didn’t co operate either. I just sort of sat there stiffly. I was tipsy, but nowhere near drunk enough for this. Kelly began to roll a joint. I thought that might help, so I said to CCG, “Just wait, I want to have some weed first.” Kelly said, “Yeah, slow down baby, Taylor likes it slow with lots of foreplay.” Not always actually, but I said nothing to contradict her. Anything that might keep him away from me for longer. I started feeling annoyed with myself. Why had I allowed myself to get into this situation, why hadn’t I spoken up earlier? Was sex with Kelly really worth this? Well it was too late now.
Kelly rolled a very large joint, badly. So badly that I started getting pieces of weed in my mouth. Apparently that one caramel vodka shot and the few sips of cider had made her drunk. I had forgotten how easily Kelly got drunk. The weed wasn’t bad, but it didn’t really calm me down enough. CCG continued to rub my breasts through my dress as I smoked it. The joint was finished all too soon, and there were no more excuses I could think up. It was time to try and do this. I realized I wasn’t at all wet, and that when we finally got naked, as was seemingly inevitable at this point, they would be sure to notice this. I tried to focus on Kelly. I moved away from CCG and leaned forward on the couch so that I could kiss her as she sat on the floor. I lifted my hands to rub her beautifully shaped breasts through her dress, while CCG moved towards me and started rubbing my ass, and trying to lift up my dress to pull my stockings down. I got down onto the floor next to Kelly, to avoid him. How he did not get any of these hints is beyond me. Maybe he did get them, and was too horny to care.
An idea suddenly came to me. Earlier in the day we had been chatting about porn stars that we liked, and had all three agreed how much we liked Andy San Dimas:
Oh yes, I love me some Andy.
I asked CCG if he had any Andy porn nearby we could watch. He said he did. I made out with Kelly some more as he found some. I reached underneath her knit top to pull it off over her head, and she took off her bra. I turned my head down intending to kiss her nipples, and realized she had had them both pierced since I had last seen her. I had never been with anyone with pierced nipples before. I reached my head down to her breasts and traced my tongue over her left nipple, tasting warm flesh and cold metal. She quivered slightly and arched her neck backwards. I ran my fingers through her hair, gripped it tightly and pressed my entire mouth down onto her nipple, suckling her, tracing my tongue back and forth repeatedly, with increasing force. She began to moan, and I felt myself starting to get wet. At last. CCG started the Andy video, and took off his shirt. He started to take off his belt, as Kelly reached out and undid mine. I looked at the large TV screen. Andy was having a pre-sex conversation with some young looking guy with a baseball cap on. Kelly stood up, wobbly on her feet and lifted me to mine. She reached down and pulled my dress off over my head. As she reached around my back to undo my bra I looked at CCG. He was totally naked now, and was stroking his hard-on. He was fairly pale all over his body, and uncircumcised. Kelly pushed me onto the couch, and I lifted my legs so that she could pull off my stockings. Andy was still talking. I wished they would get to the sex already, so that I had something to look at. CCG came to sit down next to me, and started to touch my nipples. I have very sensitive nipples, and so at first this actually felt good, but then he started to squeeze and pull on them, and I said, “Oww.” As Kelly slipped off her panties she said, “Baby, Taylor likes it gentle.” Now this, such as, “Taylor likes lots of foreplay and to take it slowly” is also not entirely true. Sometimes I like to be held down, to be spanked, to be tied up, to be fucked or licked vigorously, intensely. But I decided in this case, “gentle” was an okay word to go with, seeing as how CCG and Kelly seemed to be into a fair amount of pain, if the piercings, the random whip, and the Dominatrix outfits lying around in the lounge were anything to go by. He left my nipples alone and moved his hand down underneath my panties to put a finger inside me. It hurt a little, as I was still not that wet. He removed his hand and sucked his finger, saying “Oh my God you taste good.” Usually this sort of thing would turn me on immensely. In this case, it didn’t. I said nothing and looked at the TV again. Andy was sucking young guy’s cock. Finally, someone was getting some action, and enjoying it. I realized I was quite stoned, because everything seemed to be moving a lot slower than usual. Kelly reached forward and pulled my panties off. All three of us were now naked.
I stared at Kelly’s body. She was still as beautiful naked as I remembered. She was sitting with her legs apart, and I realized that she now also had a clit piercing. I shuddered slightly at the thought. I wanted to reach out and touch her, to feel her clit, and slip my fingers inside of her. But I realized CCG was saying something. “What?” I said. “I said, do you want to watch me fuck Kelly or do you want to taste me”, he said, gesturing to his cock. Instead of saying “Are those really my only two options”, I said, “I want to watch you fuck her.” He said, “Okay, but I want to taste you first.” “Didn’t your dentist say you can’t go down on anyone for a few weeks?” I said, but he responded, “I don’t care.” He got down on his knees and pretty much plunged his face into my cunt. Regardless of how unattractive I found him, I think that if the sexiest man/woman on earth tried to go down on me like that, I would be equally unimpressed. I lasted about 6 seconds and then said “Owww, sorry, but that is really sore.” Kelly smacked CCG on the arm, “Baby I TOLD you, Taylor doesn’t like it rough.” He pulled a face and said, “Fine,” moving behind Kelly and pushing her down onto all fours. She crawled towards me like that so that her face was positioned between my legs. CCG raised her hips to him and thrust into her. She crinkled her face up slightly at the penetration, and then raised her right hand to play with my clit. She licked her thumb and then began rubbing her thumb up and down on it. On the TV Andy was being fucked on a couch, her one leg almost raised behind her head. I tried to focus on Kelly touching me, and on Andy being fucked. I began to relax, and as Kelly raised her tongue to my clit, I moaned slightly and began to touch my nipples. Just as this was starting to really feel good, Kelly’s eyes began to droop and she dropped her hips down to the floor, causing CCG’s cock to slide out of her, and she rested her cheek against my inner thigh. She looked tired, and peaceful. I stroked her hair, feeling some kind of intense, indefinable emotion for her. “Kelly,” CCG said. She didn’t respond. “Kelly! Come on, Kelly!” But she had passed out, there was no point. He cursed and stood up. “Sorry Taylor,” he said, “we’ll have to continue this another time. I mean, you didn’t even get to taste her.” It was true, I hadn’t. I said nothing, and feigned sleepiness. He turned off Andy, who was in the process of sucking cock again, waiting to swallow the cum soon to be unleashed into her mouth. He reached down and lifted one of Kelly’s arms around his neck, and half carried half dragged her to the bed. I followed them through into the bedroom to make sure that she was okay. He put her into bed and she groggily asked for a bucket to be placed next to her. He went to get one, and I kissed her moist forehead, stroking her hair back behind her ear. She grabbed onto my arm and said, “Taylor, sleep with us.” And pulled me down into the bed next to her. I held her for a minute, and considered it, but then CCG came back, bucket in hand. He placed it next to her, and got into bed on next to me, so that I was in the middle. He said, “So you’ve come to join us, have you? Kelly pass me the condoms” Kelly was too passed out to respond, thankfully. I opened my mouth to protest but was cut off as he said, “Never mind, I’ll get them.” “Actually!” I nearly shouted. “Um, actually, I am feeling very tired.” I considered just trying to sleep there, but honestly I feared he might try to fuck me in my sleep. Nothing he had done up to this point had convinced me otherwise. I got up, mumbling, “Sorry, goodnight” and I closed the door behind me. I went over to the sex couch where I sat with my head in my hands for a moment. Then I got up, arranged the pillows, grabbed a folded up blanket from nearby, and turned out the light.
THE MORNING AFTER
I woke early. The sun streamed in through the white curtains into the lounge. I felt sick and hungover. My mouth was dry from the alcohol and the weed. I was hungry, but this wasn’t my house, and I didn’t feel comfortable raiding the fridge. I stumbled to the bathroom to pee, which was when I saw CCG’s entire upper denture in a glass on the basin. They creeped me out. I decided to at least look for something to drink, and I found a 2 litre Coke bottle in the fridge with about a fifth left inside it. I drank it. It was flat, but it helped a little. I heard movement in the bedroom, and I sprinted back to the couch, not wanting them to know that I was awake, not ready to deal with either of them yet. But no one appeared. I felt angry with myself. I should have been assertive. I should have said, Look, I don’t want to do anything sexual with you CCG, but please don’t take offense. I know that I was afraid of it being awkward if I did that, knowing I had to stay with them, and knowing that he was going to have to drive me home the next day. My own behavior confused me. I am usually so assertive, so forward. I made a decision then and there that, no matter how much I wanted to fuck someone, or no matter how much I cared about someone, I would not be willing to be sexually involved with their partner, if I was not attracted to them. I was going to learn from this.
I played on my phone for a while, quickly hiding it and pretending to be asleep when CCG did finally emerge. I cursed myself for not having put on clothes to sleep in, as I was still naked. He made a lot of noise in the kitchen, but I continued to feign sleep. Eventually the smell of coffee caused my caffeine addiction to kick in, and I pretended to “wake up”. I sat up, wrapping the blanket around my breasts, and stroking one of the dogs who had come to say hi, as CCG made me coffee, and making the following comment about my usage of the blanket, “It’s not like I haven’t seen it before.”
The morning that followed was mostly boring, coupled with many moments of awkward. One of these would be when one of their dogs licked the top of my breast that was showing out of the blanket, and CCG said, “Ooooh, I would love to be doing that.” This time not only did I say nothing, but I glared at him. Kelly made an appearance, looking exhausted and hungover. CCG immediately suggested we continue on from the night before. I said, “Actually, I am feeling very hungover and ill, and I really need to eat.” Kelly looked almost relieved, as she was still also feeling very ill. “I’m okay to go home now, if you’re okay to take me.” CCG said, “No, why don’t go buy some bacon and eggs and cook us all some breakfast?” “I don’t eat eggs.” I said. There was an awkward silence. Kelly said, “Well why don’t we all go out for breakfast?” I said, “Okay, will you be able to take me home after?” CCG said, “Well let’s come back here after and see what happens.” I said nothing, but sighed loudly. Nothing was going to happen, I had already decided. But going out for breakfast sounded like a good hangover cure. We went to a nearby diner. We didn’t talk much, as Kelly and I nursed our hangovers and CCG nursed his sexual frustration.
When we got back I asked if I could use the computer, claiming I needed to send an important email. Actually I just wanted an excuse to distract myself with, away from CCG. I messed around on the internet and facebook and then saw I had now gotten a friend request from CCG. I couldn’t exactly not accept it without pissing him or Kelly off, so I accepted it. I should have waited though, because he immediately started sending me messages on fb, from the other room where he was on his phone. He sent me, “God you are sexy. Do you want to fool around?” I closed my fb so that maybe he would think I hadn’t seen them. I opened a Wikipedia page and looked up some serial killers I had heard about recently on the crime channel, so that it looked like I was doing something at the pc. I decided it was time to talk to Kelly and tell her I wanted to go home. I called out for her. Shortly after, CCG appeared. I said, “I was just looking for Kelly.”
“Oh,” I said. He came to look at my screen. “You’re looking up serial killers?”
“That’s hot,” he said, and laughed. I said nothing.
He came to sit next to me and said, “You know we don’t need to wait for Kelly to wake up. I want to rip those pants right off of you, right now.”
I swallowed. I said, “The thing is, I am still very tired, and not feeling so great, so I don’t really feel like doing anything. Sorry.”
He stared at me for a while, as I stared at the floor.
“Maybe when she wakes up then,” he said. I said nothing. He got up, and he left the room.
I hid in there for an hour until Kelly woke up. I went through to the lounge to sit next to her, and rest my head on her shoulder. I touched her leg and said, “Kelly, it’s been lovely seeing you, but I need to get back to my brother’s house.” “Are you sure?” She said. I shrugged and said, “Yeah.” Kelly said to CCG, “Baby can we take Taylor home now?” He looked at me and said, “So you don’t want to do anything?”
“I really just want to get home,” I said.
And so he stomped around the house getting dressed. I leaned to Kelly’s ear and whispered, “Why is he getting ready so aggressively?”
Kelly shrugged and said, “Oh. He is just grumpy and pissed off because he didn’t get laid.”
They drove me home in silence, apart from CCG’s metal music blasting throughout the car. I reached from the backseat and slipped my hand passed the passenger seat and held Kelly’s hand the whole way there.
I did not see them again while I was in Place by the Sea for the next few days. Ron and I moved down to Place by the Sea in early December. CCG and Kelly got married 2 weeks later. We were 2 of the 4 people there who were Kelly’s friends. The rest were all CCG’s friends, increasing my thinking that she is becoming more and more isolated. She looked more beautiful than I had ever seen her. I got drunk at their wedding to cope.
On New Year’s Eve I sent Kelly a message asking if we could finally go out on some sort of date and talk about the possibility of restarting our relationship, which is what she had brought up when I had previously visited. She did not respond. A few days later I sent her a message asking her about. She responded that she was “thinking about it.” I was confused by this response, as she was the one who had brought it up originally. Every time I have tried to initiate plans with her alone, so that we can talk about the fact that I want a relationship with her, and only her, not CCG, she has avoided it, and wanted to invite him along, at which case I have then backed out. It’s now been over a month and I still haven’t seen her. If she is unwilling, or he is unwilling to let her, have a relationship with me without his involvement, then there will be no relationship. As fucked up as that makes me feel.